Make me understand the way of Your precepts,
So I will meditate on Your wonders.
My soul weeps because of grief;
Strengthen me according to Your word. (Psalm 119:27-28, NASB)
-God is the one Who will give us understanding His precepts (statutes, the way He wants us to live)
-Meditating upon those precepts is important.
-God's Word is able to strengthen us even when we are burdened by grief, even when wrapped in depression, even when tears make it difficult to see clearly.
I am going to continue my analogy from yesterday's Confessions of a Tree Hugger. There are days when it is like the fog has descended. The King James translates it: "My soul melts from heaviness." The NIV, "My soul is weary with sorrow." Whatever words we use, this kind of grief ways us down and makes it hard to see clearly the way in which we should go. It threatens our peace and challenges our security.
I spent one of those sleepless kinds of nights last night. When I tried to sleep my dreams were all filled with people and even my pets dying. It is not very restful to have your nights tormented by thoughts of having everything you have come to care about being ripped from you. This is what a "soul melting from heaviness" looks like. I spent the wee hours of the morning asking God what I should do? How to move on from here in this place of broken trust. People can let us down in very painful ways and sometimes all it takes is an unkind word.
But God's Word has a way of letting the light in. His word has a way of driving away the fog that makes it hard to see clearly.
Slowly the fog begins to lift. Our way becomes clearer.
The sun breaks through the fog and eventually drives it away.
And it is not that the grief is driven away- for just like the trees in the woods- that which brought the grief is still there. But my vision is cleared enough to see those trees for what they really are; to see where they stand in my way and where it is safe to travel. By meditating on God's Word I can walk through the forest of grief now with confidence in Who He is and what He has accomplished in my life and know without a doubt that His love for me remains and I do not walk this path through grief alone. Today is a day I need to be strengthed by God's words. I may even find my perspective changed as I allow Him to carry me on His shoulders for awhile.
Grace, Peace, and Mercy,
I am a woman with a Mary heart and these are my musings as I read and study God's Word
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